okay today we will finally talk about something very important – Confidence. Alot of you always ask me how I am so confident or how I did get so confident. I thought it is time to talk about it.
Me and Confidence met for the first time like 4-5 years ago. Before that I was the typical skinny girl that got her period and turned into a overweight girl. Kids bullied me at school of course, hell even on vacation a group of kids bullied me every day. And I think that is where it all started. That is where I lost myself and started questioning myself. I aksed myself if I am wrong or even what I did to those kids that they treated me like this. And hell yes, I hated my body. Even my aunts talked to me like I am some piece of trash. And when a part of your own family acts like this you really start to struggle.
So I struggled – I struggled for years and years. I was afraid to go anywhere – the beach, the pool, the store or the club. What if people act like the kids on vacation? What if they will say nasty things again? So I stayed in alot and all I did was hate myself. I cried alot and that time I thought no man on this planet will ever love a fat girl like me.
What I always had was a big love for fashion. Hell I loved beautiful clothes but at that time there were no plussize stores around and nothing great to wear for girls like me. I had to buy my jeans at men stores and everything else from H&M (which was not that bad). But I did not wear what I wanted to wear because I was scared. Scared of what others will think or say. On beach vacations I was dressed like I am a in person tent – a huge tshirt and a bathing suit from the granny store. Taking that shirt of was NEVER a option!
I did a million diets to fit it and yeah I lost weight but I also gained it when I had my next I hate my body day. It was a daily struggle and a daily fight with myself. And I was not happy.
But then suddenly everything changed. With the growing plussize industry and the growing plussize bloggers I finally found someone to look up to. Rolemodels – Girls that looked like me. I started to look at my body in a different way. And I realized something – my body is my temple. Eveything I went through in my life you can see on my body. All the scars, cellulite and stretchmarks. The thick thighs and that tummy. It tells my story. And I realized that I will never be happy when I can not be happy with myself. (Which also means if you think you will be happier thinner then do something about it). I started to work out (but not to loose weight) and I started step by step by dressing and wearing the things I want. Shoutout to ASOS for being a big part of that! And today – four years later – I am happy. Yes, I still struggle sometimes and right now I struggle a little with my tummy but I can say that I love myself. I love who I am today and the journey that I had. And I can not wait for what is coming next.
So ladies, stop worrying about what other people will say. You only have this one life. Live it up and live it the way you want to live it. Wear what makes you happy and enjoy every moment. Yes, flaunt that body at the beach – wear a great bikini or swimsuit and show the world what your mommy gave you! This is your life and you have the chance to make it a good one!
I have a couple tipps for you on how to be more confident:
1. Stop comparing and stay focused on YOU!
2. Relax. Go with the flow and don`t stress the little things. (hardest one for me)
3. LOVE YOURSELF! YOU ARE A GIFT! Nothing will be the same if you did not exist!
4. Be positive and look for the good in every situation.
5. Do what you love. Life is too short to waste your time doing anything otherwise.
Hardest for me was the swimsuit situation. So I wanted to show you a couple of my swimsuit pictures and where to find good swimsuits.
Places to get great swimsuits and bikinis:
Happy shopping ladies and love yourself!